Wednesday, July 9, 2014


I wake up to silence
every morning in this castle
without my trusted dogs this time
choosing to be alone then
sometimes wallowing in loneliness
the rejection I projected
reflected back to me

I am learning
how I create
watching my addictions
going along with them
following them home for tea
enjoying the fictions I imagine

here I can stay undressed
until I take my body for an adventure
walking it instead of a dog
trips to the store alone
cooking for one
I always make too much

next door two terriers sometimes worry
about a deer, quietly munching in this yard
squirrels tirelessly attack the bird feeder
a cardinal waits until they’ve tired
not noticing he has no head feathers
and I wonder about pesticides and bees

the floorboards creak as I walk
the air stirred gently by the fan
a microclimate of solitude and quiet
day night and in between
surrounded by cicadas and frogs
500 yards away cars pass by

twice a day I practice sitting
once a day I tire myself outside
often I pace the house reading
I distract myself far too late into the night
I try to find discipline to write
I bask in gratitude for my guardian angels

but really I am pausing
letting the unnameable work
so more often I will notice
when the quality arises
that allows me the clarity
to see many things better, but also
to know why I still dream about you

No comments:

Post a Comment